I clearly remember the day.
It was my senior year of college, a late spring afternoon and the weekend was ahead. My roommates and I had decided to go to FAC (know what I mean?!) and I was definitely in the mood for that.
I’d reached my Fuck It Moment.
What’s that, you ask?
It’s the moment when you’ve wanted something to happen soooooo badly…and it hasn’t. For whatever reason, that THING has not been delivered to you on a platter.
You work hard (you think), you position yourself to (hopefully) be in the right place at the right time, you do what you (think) you’re supposed to do.
Thing is: you really don’t know. Thinking and hoping aren’t plans: they’re vapor. Faith – and sometimes faithless – ideas that we put on ourselves to be in a state of unsuredness.
Then, after all the effort and thinking and hoping you put forth, nothing happens. “Well,” you say to yourself, “fuck it.”
Then things start happening.
The ice floe breaks, the clouds part and ‘things’ start going your way.
It’s the leaping you have to do – to say ‘fuck it’ – in order for the net to indeed appear.
You have to reach a critical juncture in order to realize it’s sink or swim, fish or cut bait, make it or not. And then you let go. And THAT is when faith really kicks in and things start happening.
I’ve reached my Fuck It Moment (FIM) with another endeavor I’ve been toiling at for 9 years. It’s been a remarkable endeavor, one that’s put me on a map I didn’t even know existed. And it’s not going where I so desperately want it to go and can envision it making a huge positive impact on our world. So (you guessed it), fuck it. Time to move on.
The great thing about reaching the FIM is that it’s clarifying and defining. You trust in yourself, rather than others. When you leap, that net will appear though it may be different from what you thought you wanted or needed. A net nonetheless. It’s maddening, cathartic and motivating.
These past several months, I’ve been in a state of self-made limbo. Now, I’m not. I’ve achieved the FIM and am moving forward.
Business owners may know well of what I write. Anyone can identify with this moment if you want and work toward making something real, something that’s a struggle, not in the main stream and unusual. In some ways it drives us more; to do something unique, unproven, even completely foreign to any one else.
I’ve now defined what it is that’s next for me. I’ve met and surpassed the latest FIM. I’m putting to rest – though not killing – the other endeavor in the interest of growing the new fledgling. The previous endeavor remains viable for the absolutely ideal client. For now, anyway. Until I decide to retire it all together, which I don’t have to be concerned with right now anyway.
The new fledgling isn’t actually new; it’s simply a new combination and focus of an idea that’s been simmering under my surface for years. One that combines at least three areas of life I’m fascinating with and adept at. So here I go. I’m excited.
Fuck it no more for now. Stay tuned. Onward.