How Do You Find Your Why?

Have you ever wondered how to find or determine your purpose? Meaning, why you’re doing what you’re doing?

Is there something else you’d rather be doing?

Maybe you already love what you do. Sweet!

If you don’t and want to get clear on What I Should Do, then today’s video lesson will help.

I want to share a simple and very effective tool to help you Find Your Why.

Why = connecting with our purpose.

When we connect with our purpose – when we’re reaaaaaaaaly clear about how we want to spend the precious hours of our lives – then we’re way better equipped to focus and accomplish and serve.

Connecting becomes easier and clearer (…and focus is hard for me sometimes!)

Here’s how to make your own Org Chart, to help you figure out and connect with your Why.


Feel free to share this forward with other people you know can use it, to help them connect with their Why – their purpose.


How else can I help you with your connecting efforts?

Questions, requests and suggestions are always welcome.

You can get your own copy of the Connectivity Canon which is loaded with ideas, strategy and tactics to help as well.

Thanks for being part of the Connecting Community. I’m glad you’re here.


Connecting With Middle Schoolers

For the record: I Love Middle School aged people.


Go ahead. Be jealous.

Go ahead. Call me crazy (if you do, you clearly don’t already know me!)

So go ahead, think what you will… I think – and know – that I love people of middle school age.


Because if you treat them openly with respect, they’ll do the same in return.

They’ve not (yet??) developed impermeable crusts or cynicism or doubt or mistrust. If they have those things, it’s because some stupid short sighted adult judged, mocked, belittled and otherwise communicated with that person that they weren’t worthy. BS.

Middle schoolers are amazing!! (It’s their parents that are hard to live with sometimes… another topic for another time, perhaps.)

They’re still open to trusting others, if the others show themselves to be trustworthy. They want to connect with the world around them. I love helping them do that, in a safe and respected setting.

When I taught middle school, years ago, I didn’t accept the job because it was middle school. I accepted it because I wanted to teach. And I had substitute taught literally everything in a small rural American school district (think: town of 1500, outlying areas a few thousand more…). I taught because there was nothing else in the world I wanted to do more.

The principal extended the offer to me and I accepted. Boom.

Connecting with this magic age was life changing for me.

Really, I’d not spent any time thinking I did or didn’t want to teach them; I simply wanted to teach. And I knew there were a few ages that weren’t my jam (let’s just say I’m glad other teachers like other ages).

Middle School age is tooooootallllly my jam.

I love them because I understand them.

Chocolate drawing made by a middle schooler

They’re nuts. Their bodies are changing, daily. Their thoughts are running crazy, in large part due to the still mercurial growth of their bodies. They’re fun and open and funny and challenging and affectionate and stubborn and….. Well, everything we all are, except way more open about a lot of it.

At heart, I’m likely a middle schooler. Open, silly, like to have fun, unsure, happy, willing, trusting.

I learned a lot those few years with my middle school classroom. The connections that were created and built sustain me and remind me, all these years later, of how it takes so little to make that first move. To start a conversation that can be meaningful with one other person at a time.

My connection to middle school people is one I relish and will forever enjoy.

So, go ahead and scoff if it makes you feel good. Laugh, shake your head. I’m giving you back what you’re dishing out!

They’re whip sharp, will engage in anything if they trust you and will make the world a better place, despite all of us non-middle school age, supposed “adults.” Being connected to middle schoolers makes my world better.

I dare you: connect with a middle schooler today. Tell me about it below.

Your Why Is Your North Star

“The North Star or Pole Star – aka Polaris – is famous for holding nearly still in our sky while the entire northern sky moves around it. That’s because it’s located nearly at the north celestial pole, the point around which the entire northern sky turns. Polaris marks the way due north.” – EarthSky

Why = Polaris.

Why “Why”?

Why: adverb; for what? for what reason, cause, or purpose?

  • Why did you get up today?
  • Why did you ‘go to work’?
  • Why did you go to school?
  • Why did you eat something?
  • Why didn’t you make that phone call?
  • Why did you smile at that person?
  • Why do you have a dog or a cat (or both) in your family?
  • Why do you like board games?
  • Why do you think I ask any of these questions?

Answer: why drives everything we do. It’s the molten core of our decision making. Based on what we know, what we know about it and how we feel about it because of what we know, that’s where our Why comes from.

Why is our vision, our beliefs and convictions, our opinions and therefore our actions.

Why we do or we don’t isn’t the direction I’m going here.

It’s Why – at all, to begin with.

Why anything for that matter, and why not?

Why is the very first consideration in connectivity.

Why we decide to connect at all, or not.

From there, it’s all in the Framework: what we do once we’ve determined our Why.

In the Connectivity Canon, I clearly outline the Connectivity Framework – the 7 Elements of Connectivity, as I’ve dubbed them – to help teach and understand the actual process of connecting with another person.

What’s your Why?

What’s YOUR why??

It’s more than an en vogue question; it’s our whole driving force of what we do and don’t, who we meet and won’t.

Why for me means that the works I put my energy and attention into has to matter, based on my own values and convictions. Like you, I want to do works and set out to accomplish meaningful endeavors and tasks, projects and goals.

My why gets me up and moving, keeps me going and inspires me when the road is clear, as well as when it’s foggy as hell. Why is my unseen and still fully-foundationally-understood-to-me meaning.

Connectors have a clear why. I’m a connector. I help people learn the why & how to connect with other people, on purpose with a service mindset.

Think about it this way: when you are comfortably and confidently able to create and develop relationships, what can that mean? The answer is: everything.

If you’d like to know more specifics, get your own copy of the Canon today with this link.

How Do You Turn A Ship?

Here’s how –     And a hint: it involves prairie dogs….